


What About Us

by KeeperofSeeds



Series: Femslashficlets - language of the flowers challenge [16]
Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Bisexual Peggy Carter, Canonical Character Death, Community: femslashficlets, F/F, Femslash, Femslash February, Ficlet, First Kiss, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Infidelity, Marvel Universe, Post Captain America, Pre-Canon, Rare Pairings, Sad Ending, Time Skips, Wordcount: 100-1.000, Wordcount: 500-1.000
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-10
Updated: 2018-02-10
Packaged: 2019-03-15 09:29:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13610469
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KeeperofSeeds/pseuds/KeeperofSeeds
Summary: Peggy and Maria Stark, an unexpected affair, and something that almost could have been. A series of moments.





	What About Us

**Author's Note:**

> 16\. Poppy

Every year Maria Collins-Carbonell Stark receives a bouquet of flowers on her birthday. They're chosen for color and presentation over any secret meaning. The bright reds mixed with delicate pink and white along the edges.

The card is signed with a single letter.

Maria enjoys the way it feels like living in a movie. Glamour and subterfuge. Secrets and past lovers.

She smiles and tucks the card with the others in a small box on the top shelf of her closet.

* * *

 

It had begun not long after the wedding. A ceremony to remember.

One of a few things now worth remembering, Peggy thinks bitterly as she watches Maria pour herself another drink. Her makeup is smeared. The dark shadow of mascara fanning out from where hands had wiped away tears after yet another shouting match.

She and Howard had seemed happy not so long ago, but it quickly was becoming obvious that the sense of adventure and excitement that had drawn them together, had hidden a host of problems. Maria demonstrated one, throwing back her head and downing her drink in a long careless swallow.

"You're picking up Howard's bad habits," Peggy quietly remarkes from her spot on the couch.

Maria scoffed. "You would know better than I would." She poured another drink. "Howard's been away more often than he's been home, and when he is here he's always coming home late, already rushing downstairs to work even more without a hello to me."

She weaves her way to the couch and thrusts her drink out to Peggy to hold as she collapses downward, head falling on Peggy's shoulder.

"It's been weeks since he's touched me," she mutters, and Peggy almost drops the glass.

"What happened to the passionate man I met at the casino?" She laments, folding her legs under her. "Why does my husband changed so much? One day distant and cold, the next angry, then violently passionate." Dark eyes turn to meet Peggy's, seeking answers she doesn't have.

She's never seen bruises on Maria, never thought Howard would be the type, but then, it's been some time since the War. Time changes them all. She isn't as close to Howard as she once was.

She doesn't know what Howard needs to see what's right in front of him. She does at least, know this.

"You deserve better, Maria," she says softly, and brushes a kiss against her forehead, careful not to leave a lipstick stain behind.

Maria pulls away and blinks, just long enough for Peggy to worry if she's crossed some line with her friend, when Maria surges forward and mashes their lips together. Nails scrap and pull at the loose hairs at Peggy's neck. Maria tastes like the liquor she'd been drinking, smokey and sharp.

When they pull back for air, Maria's eyes are bright and the red of Peggy's lipstick is smeared across her lips now.

"You're right," she says, smiling. Slow and feral. "I do deserve better."

* * *

 

They fall into bed off and on over the years. Frantic and fast paced lovemaking. Maria matches the lipstick marks Peggy leaves behind with hickies of her own. Always on breasts or the inside of one strong thigh. Places that can't be seen. Like she wants to make sure Peggy can't forget their encounters.

They meet up less after Tony is born. After Maria learns that a child cannot fix what is broken between her and Howard.

That's when the flowers start. Easy to arrange, and easy to dismiss as the actions of an old friend should someone start to look too close. Sometimes, if she's feeling particularly maudlin, Peggy will send along a separate card. She writes out a short message with her non dominant hand and signs it with a press of red lips. She trusts Jarvis to be discreet when collecting the mail.

* * *

 

Once Peggy is appointed head of SHIELD, Maria stops by. She's supposedly there for Howard, but no one will question her making a detour to congratulate an old friend. Still, there are no recordings or logs to show how she ended up spending over 20 minutes in the director's office that day. Only Peggy will remember how she scrubbed at the lipstick stains with a handkerchief and reapplied her own darker lipstick before leaving, looking like a movie star gliding through the grey hallways of the base.

* * *

 

They rarely see each other these days. Tony is growing up, and Peggy knows just how smart the boy is. She doesn't want to make things worse for him at the house, or have him end up in the middle of this thing. He's got enough trouble navigating his parent's relationship. Howard and Maria have given up all pretense and live separate lives besides the fundraising dinners or company parties.

Peggy occasionally attends a fundraiser, but only smiles from across the room. Maybe, if Howard is particularly drunk or occupied by his business partner, she sends over a drink. The same smoky bourbon Maria drank that first night.

* * *

 

Peggy stands in the cemetery, ignoring the closing threat of thunder, and stares down at the headstone.

She should go comfort Tony. She should call SHIELD and check on what evidence has been found from the wreck.

But she can't stop staring at the tombstone, and the carved name staring back at her. Proof that she'll never share another drink again with Maria, never hear her rant about Howard and his self obsession, never feel the ghost of her lips sucking marks along her breast.

She's gone. They both are.

But Peggy is not stranger to loss. She gives herself five minutes more, then wraps her scarf around her hair, not to better hide any tears she tells herself, but to protect from the coming rain. She wraps herself in her in old memories as well, remembers the good times, the ring of Maria's rare laugh....and turns away. She leaves a bright red flower behind. A beacon in the grey city that surrounds it.

**Author's Note:**

> What about us?  
> What about all the broken happy ever afters?  
> What about us?  
> What about all the plans that ended in disaster?  
> What about love? What about trust?  
> What about us?


End file.
